Disaster Date

I went out on a date this guy from one of my college classes. We were project group members & that is how we got to talking. I feel like the relationship talk started way too early it has really made me uncomfortable. I realize my pull away behavior is just making me more attractive because it's making him chase me. This is pretty much the opposite of what I want. I feel like I've tried to tell him I don't want a relationship. I'm okay with still being friendly when we see each other at school. But I don't need it to go any farther than what it is right now. I had brought up possibly going on a date and he agreed because seemed interested. I went on the date basically like not knowing what to expect. He was a chivalrous gentleman and paid for the date. Our date/hang out was at a small cafe near the school. I enjoyed talking to him very much also enjoyed his company. However, enjoying the company is different than having romantic feelings for another person. Maybe I am shallow? I always see him in class with his hat on and he never takes it off. He is 26 and severely balding underneath the hat! He is too young to be balding. How come he doesn't just shave it off? The other thing that I didn't like was that he was a smoker and it was yellowing his teeth badly. I really prefer to not date a smoker since I don't smoke myself. I think that is pretty fair and it is a big turn off for me. He is a huge Star Wars nerd and gamer neither those interest me that much. I feel like we have completely different interests when it comes down to it. Sure, I have watched Star Wars before like most people thought it was okay. But I'm not obsessed to the point where I have Star Wars movie tattoos. I don't think I can work with this ( no judgement on him personally). I think I'll pass on this on folks. He also told me that he spends two to three hours a day gaming. I think that is unwise since he isn't employed other than a work study job given by the school. Work study does count as having a job but he could probably have two jobs , spend more time studying or have more time to go out on dates if he wasn't busy with the games. Are the video games a priority or is having a girlfriend a priority? We kissed at the end of the date. Honestly, I felt no spark and it was awful. The guy didn't keep his lips relaxed enough for me so it was difficult to kiss him.  He said that he liked the kiss but I didn't want no more parts of that. I just wasn't into it. I think my kisses can be very playful and sexual so it doesn't shock me. I've been kissing boys since I was thirteen so the experience adds up as grown up. I just wasn't feeling him on this date. I wanted to be into him but it just wasn't working. I feel like I tried to let him down easy and the best way possible. He just doesn't listen probably have to reestablish boundaries again.

Online Dating is it Shallow?

From my past experiences when I think about online dating I'm not sure its a good thing.
I hope if you are trying it out that's wonderful and don't let my opinion change your mind.

Main Issues

1.) Player's Playground
- Online dating makes it very easy for players to prey on young women that want to find true love
- Heterosexual women tend to write gobs & gobs on themselves giving them a lot to capitalize on
- Its easy to juggle seeing multiple women at the same time & not let any of them know about it

2.) Provided with Too Many Options ( Over saturation)
 - Could your perfect match have gotten lost in the shuffle?
 - If you don't have any kind of filtering system what are you picking your guys based on?

3.) Beware of Men with no Jobs
 - Unemployed men tend to hang around on free dating sites
 -  Why? Because its a f***ing free site & they are bored trying to get some
 - If you have time to be on a free dating site then you have time get a job &
   move out your Mommy's house! OOO! Yes, I'm going to keep it real sorry.

4.) Don't get Catfished & Swindled
 - Investigate anyone who is making big claims like "Hey guys, I'm a millionaire"
 - If it sounds too good to be true then it is too good to be true
 - Google imaging photos if you think someone is a fake is always a decent shot at getting the truth

5.) Wants Sex on the First Date
 - NO NO NO NO!!!
 - Online dating can be risky you are entering the home of a complete stranger
- Don't roll the dice with your life
- If he insists on taking you home & there is a lot of sex talk before meeting up its not worth it

High school guys vs. College guys

Do you feel there is a major difference between the two?

I think high school guys are more willing to get into a relationship. College guys are more likely to just to want to hook up and play the field. No question it depends on the person and the specific individual but I'm seeing alot more of that lately.

Ways To Make Your Boyfriend or Girlfriend Feel Special

*I would say I'm a professional at this one! Not to toot my own horn or anything!

Ways to Make Your Boyfriend or Girlfriend Feel Special

1.) Text Messaging - A highly abused form of communication but can be very effective when in a relationship. You can send each other cute photos, good morning texts, or a" just wanted to say i love you and hope you have a good day" let someone know you are there

2.) Speaking Positively About Your Partner- This is a huge one for couples; I can't stress it enough! There's nothing like knowing the person you are with is 100% behind you. This helps create positive reinforcement within the relationship! A simple "I believe in you" or "I know you got this taken care of" goes a long way for people. NEVER curse at your partner!

3.) Have a Skype Date Night - This is good for couples who are in a long distance relationships. The second best to seeing your significant other is to web chat and see the other person's face. It doesn't solve everything but it can really close the gap of feeling like its been a long time.

4.) Swing By Their Work or School For Five Minutes To Make Out - I used to do this all the time with my ex. It would be make each other's days that we could get to see each other first off. We both knew we couldn't stay very long but quick kisses help keep your significant other on your mind. Also it helps keep sexy it and know some passion is still left in the relationship

5.) Do Something Special Just Because (Leave A Gift) - Handmaid gifts are always great ideas if they are personalized. Once made one of my boyfriends a scrapbook with pictures of us. Many people enjoy receive flowers or chocolate and it doesn't have to be Valentine's Day.

6.) Write Them Cute Notes on Facebook - This tip isn't for everyone but if you feel comfortable doing it then why not. Leaving notes around the house are even better

My best advice to keeping a relationship alive is don't let the passion die! The small gestures usually mean the most! Say I love you every single day because we never know when it could be over

Places to Meet Your Next Boyfriend or Girlfriend

1) School - this a good place to start! Schools have a wide variety people. Try to get involved in a club you are passionate about ! ( more variety)

2) Concerts - always good tons of emo cuties or country rockers just depends  ( more musical)

3) Parties - awesome networking chances as well as being introduced to a hottie (more spontaneous)

4) Coffee Shop or Bookstore - always seems draw a plethora of interesting minds ( more intellectual)

5) Wine Tasting or Art Gallery - very sophisticated scene  ( more classy)

6) Online- wouldn't advise it but you might end up liking it. Give it a shot! (more unknown)

Online Dating My Thoughts

I think alot of people downplay how much online dating is actually used. People are more willing to make up stories than tell the truth( in regards to how they met there significant other). There is a large stigma attached online dating. I suppose its looked at where the losers to meet there perfect match. I will be the first to admit that I used it in the past. My experiences were widely varied. I met a lot of cool guys and weirdos in between. But those failures that just is going to add on to my experiences as a person. I realize that there are success stories from the online dating world. Many people who were successful kept up their personal pages up for a whole year. That's a long time before you meet the one. At the same time, I have to warn people about guys who say they want a relationship. They parade all around these sites when they just want to hook up! Sites have specfic caterogies for people who want random play( or want more "friends"). It takes the same amount of energy to have friends with benefits that does to make a relationship. What are people so scared of? Other than the obvious rejection or getting hurt?

I'm Back with Introspection

I've been a bad blogger! I haven't written since last month. I have been trying to drown myself in my school work. Even for me getting over a break up can be devasting! My boyfriend and I broke up! I thought he was going to be my one. But I did my best with the information I had at the time. Nobody can ask me to do anymore than that. I think I need to put myself on a dating break. Ever since the fall I started school I've been dating like non-stop. I guess because I'm on the part of my life, I finally have the time. However, I really need a break and just time to slow it down. That doesn't mean I'm taking a break from writing this blog. This is a passion of mine! I feel like I need to put myself in dating rehab! I need time for reflection and just to be in my own space again. It's dawned on me either I was always dating someone casually or in a relationship ( all these months). WOW! You might as well call me a professional dater